Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Insights into Grad Student Life: Working from Home

Today, it snowed about 10-30cm. In Vancouver, this is enough to close schools.
T: I'll probably be "working from home" today then...

N:
The only part of that that belongs in quotes is 'working'.

T:
LOL... True.

T:
Hey, I'm putting that up on my blog

N:
Okay -- I'll only charge minimal royalties for it. Like a family discount.

T:
Excellent. Per page-view, right?

N:
Sure

T:
Don't quit your day job!

Monday, January 28, 2008

Dictionary Reveals Latent Truths

Today, the VP Academic/Provost gave our lab a visit. I didn't know what "provost" meant, so I looked it up in the dictionary. The third definition really caught my eye.
pro·vost (prō'vōst', -vəst, prŏv'əst)
n. (Abbr. Prov.)
  1. A university administrator of high rank.
  2. The highest official in certain cathedrals or collegiate churches.
  3. The keeper of a prison.
  4. The chief magistrate of certain Scottish cities.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Insight

Love of My Life: I want to live a life I could write about and enjoy reading.

Me: How are you doing to this point?

LoML: It's a drag.
Be careful when fishing for compliments.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Entrepreneurial Thinking

Me: SurveyMonkey.com solves all our [survey] problems

J: That's what we need ... a problem solver

Me: I need someone to do my research. That's what I need

J: Go to researchmonkey.com ;-)

Me: We need PhDMonkey.com
At first, I thought: "$1,000,000 idea!" Then I did a rudimentary market analysis:
target population demand = high (depressed phd students)
target population size = low (phd students)
overall demand = low (depressed phd students)

spending capacity of target population = low (graduate stipend)

market viability = laughably low
Nope. Better stick to my day job.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Ringing Endorsement of Grad School

D: How far are you away from completion?

Me:
Hahaha... Mmm... Hopefully another year or so?

D:
Maybe I shouldn't have asked :-$

Me:
Hahaha... "You know how it is"

D:
That's not too bad. Hopefully you're starting to see the end of the tunnel.

Me:
Yeah, though sometimes the end gets shrouded by what appears to be some bad weather.

D:
Yeah, I know how THAT is.

D: I hate the vagaries of corporate life, but nothing compares to the constant existential dread of grad school.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Buying Bulk

G1: You haven't had your period for three months?!

G2:
Uh-huh.

G3:
You should probably take a test to check (whether you're preggers).

G1 (helpfully):
You can try First Response! I saw it on TV.

G3:
At three months, I don't think you need "first" response. You can probably go with any old generic test.

G1:
You could probably even go Kirkland brand!

G2:
Isn't that Costco?!

G1:
Yeah but you could save so much!

G3:
If you're buying these things in bulk, you should probably step back and take a good look at yourself.

G2
nods thoughtfully.